The Bath Salts Bandit

Mark Thompson, 19, of Alum Creek, W.Va., is accused of stealing his next-door neighbor’s pygmy goat. Lisa Powers, the goat’s owner, said another neighbor called her nephew at 3:15 in the morning to report the crime, and he went over to retrieve the animal. But when he and two female friends arrived at Thompson’s house, “they opened the door and [Thompson] was standing there with his pants down,” Powers said. They noticed Thompson was wearing a bra and panties, and “the goat was dead and there was blood everywhere. It was quite a scene.”

Thompson has been charged with animal cruelty. A veterinarian is doing a necropsy on the dead goat, in part to search for “signs of sexual trauma,” said detective Cpl. Sean Snuffer. Thompson told investigators he was on a three-day high — on “bath salts”. Newspaper reports didn’t explain what that meant.

A THOUGHT: Because they didn’t know, and were too lazy to research it I presume?!?!

ANOTHER THOUGHT: I’m not sure what the weirdest part of this story is. The fact that he kills goats in his bedroom while wearing girls underwear, the fact that you can get high on bath salts (something I didn’t know) or the fact that in Charleston, West Virginia it’s apparently okay to give your grandchildren goats as a gift.

How to Quit Drugs for Good: A Complete Self-Help Guide
Dying For Triplicate: A True Story of Addiction, Survival, & Recovery
Weirdos from Another Planet!
Illegal Drugs: A Complete Guide to their History, Chemistry, Use, and Abuse
Buzzed: The Straight Facts About the Most Used and Abused Drugs from Alcohol to Ecstasy (Third Edition)
Drugs, Society, and Human Behavior
High: Confessions of an International Drug Smuggler

Buzzed: The Straight Facts About the Most Used and Abused Drugs from Alcohol to Ecstasy (Third Edition)


About Chase Morgan
Chase Morgan is just your average, ordinary All-American writer. Chase began writing several years ago, but never published anything until the "Are You Friggen' Kidding Me?" blog launched in August of 2009. Chase simply got tired of standing around and just observing all of the craziness in the world, so this anxious writer sat down and wrote the first "Are YOu Friggen' Kidding Me?" article on August 19th, 2009. Now, any time something makes Chase say, "Are You Friggen' Kidding Me?", the issue get's transformed into an article. Chase is currently single, homeless and living under a bridge in South Florida.

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